Lily Pop Posted November 4, 2014 Report Share Posted November 4, 2014 (edited) Hey guys! I wondering if you could read and edit my two 200 word essay question answers. The first one needs to be cut down 18 words to meet the word count.They are both on Google drive on the link below; you can edit from the forum or if you have Google drive you can go into "suggesting" mode to add comments to specific sentences. Thanks in advance for any help! https://docs.google.com/document/d/12MWS3cTavLbF9-Z9L7orPC2wWPG63SrO2CPyGIjLoGk/edit?usp=sharing Edited August 10, 2015 by Lily Pop Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tintinnabulation Posted November 4, 2014 Report Share Posted November 4, 2014 Get rid of one of Scientific American's quotes. Paraphrase Frieden's. Concatenate the first paragraph - you don't need a dedicated, unilateral phrase stating what the blurb will be about, you can merge that information. Use semicolons if you must. Last, you advocate, as a strategy of dealing with Ebola, to stop worrying about it and get on with things, which is fine if that's what you want to talk about the American response to Ebola. However, to talk about Ebola itself, you should really discuss things like treatment and death rates and transmission vectors. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts