324 replies to this topic

[heartworthy]

__inthemaking, on Jan 29 2009, 11:09 AM, said:

Yeah I guess so haha. I just hate it when he gets ragged on by guys for still being a virgin. It's easier for me because I'm a girl and people don't really question why I'm waiting. His friends all know the reason why we're waiting, but sometimes acquaintances just push a little too far (like asking my boyfriend if he's gay). I guess I can understand why..I would probably expect an 18 year old guy with a girlfriend of 2 years to have had sex too, but I would never assume there's something "wrong" with him if it turns out they don't.

Ugh, sorry haha /vent.

For guys I'm guessing it's an ego boost along with a lot of social pressure. Unfortunately, I have a friend who felt he had to have sex just to be that much closer to acceptance...Maybe it's an identity for guys? That and a lot of testosterone I'd like to hear a guy's opinion

[__inthemaking]

heartworthy, on Jan 29 2009, 10:56 PM, said:

For guys I'm guessing it's an ego boost along with a lot of social pressure. Unfortunately, I have a friend who felt he had to have sex just to be that much closer to acceptance...Maybe it's an identity for guys? That and a lot of testosterone I'd like to hear a guy's opinion

Most likely. My boyfriend doesn't care, he wants to wait for marriage just as much as I do. It bothers me more than him when guys rag on him lol. And it'd be interesting to hear a guy's opinion on this as well.

[Mr. Shiver]

Well I'm not sure whether you're referring to intercourse or just sex in general. I wouldn't rush into the former anytime soon, but I see nothing wrong with the latter.

[Aboo]

__inthemaking, on Jan 30 2009, 12:15 PM, said:

Most likely. My boyfriend doesn't care, he wants to wait for marriage just as much as I do. It bothers me more than him when guys rag on him lol. And it'd be interesting to hear a guy's opinion on this as well.

The guys 'ragging' (does that still exist?) on him are pretty immature to judge him like that. It's commendable that he is waiting for marriage, than just itching to go into bed with you.

Mr. Shiver, on Jan 30 2009, 12:18 PM, said:

Well I'm not sure whether you're referring to intercourse or just sex in general. I wouldn't rush into the former anytime soon, but I see nothing wrong with the latter.

What's sex in general? Everything except sex? If it's the latter, that's called foreplay.

[Irene]

Aboo, on Jan 30 2009, 12:14 AM, said:

What's sex in general? Everything except sex? If it's the latter, that's called foreplay.

Maybe he was referring to non-intercourse sex as there is more than one type of sex.

[Aboo]

Irene, on Jan 30 2009, 01:49 PM, said:

Maybe he was referring to non-intercourse sex as there is more than one type of sex.

Like Ear / Nose / Anal

[Vvi]

We only have 2 guys in my class, and both of them are virgins. One of them really feels pressured to have sex, since his best friend (who used to be in our class before he moved to Jordan) had sex when he was around 14 and finds it really easy to get girls. So his friend, who's 17, is basically looking for anyone who's willing to have sex with him, which is of course the wrong attitude to be running around with. It all seems to be a competition of who can have sex the earliest.

Aboo, on Jan 30 2009, 11:13 AM, said:

Like Ear / Nose / Anal

Haha ear and nose? My mom's friend used to work as a nurse in casualty, she always told us really gross stories about couples who came in with objects stuck inside them. I'd wanna be a doctor just so I could laugh at all the ridiculous things people get up to in the bedroom.

[__inthemaking]

Aboo, on Jan 30 2009, 02:14 AM, said:

The guys 'ragging' (does that still exist?) on him are pretty immature to judge him like that. It's commendable that he is waiting for marriage, than just itching to go into bed with you.

Yeah I agree. And it's not like he doesn't want to have sex, we very much do haha. Just that school is the most important thing for us right now..we're both in demanding programs and we couldn't deal with the stress of a possible pregnancy, and if I do end up pregnant, we both are against abortion but we're not ready to be parents at 18 yet. And for health risks, I can't go on birth control, so we'd pretty much just be relying on a condom.

And ear/nose?! haha

[Victor L]

Condoms are 98% reliable when used properly. And that does not mean if you do it 100 times, you are bound to get pregnant 2 times.

[Vvi]

The "used properly" part is the problem. The pill is also 99% effective if used absolutely as specified by manufacturers, but only a small percentage of people do so. How it's put on, the wrong kind of lubricant, using certain spermicides with it, old condoms, etc. reduce the effectiveness. 2% refers to perfect use. And no one is perfect.

"Pregnancy rates (first year, latex)

Perfect use 2%
Typical use 10–18%"
(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Condom)

The estimated typical pregnancy rate among condom users in the US is about 14 per 100 women. (http://www.infoforhe...9/h9chap4.shtml)

So in reality, I would say that condoms are around 86%-90% effective. The really stupid people try to "double" their effectiveness to 180% by using 2 condoms, one on top of another. And then they both split, and people wonder why they end up pregnant.

So I would agree with __inthemaking that relying on just condoms isn't too smart.

[__inthemaking]

Condoms are pretty reliable, but the problem is that I've heard of way too many horror stories where condoms break, or they come off during sex. Plus my period already has a tendency to be irregular..it can be anywhere from a week early to almost 2 weeks late, and right now when it's a week late, I don't worry about it. But if I was having sex, I would pretty much be freaking out. I can't imagine focusing on school while being paranoid that I'm also pregnant every single month.

[Mr. Shiver]

Aboo, on Jan 30 2009, 02:13 AM, said:

Like Ear / Nose / Anal

No, I was referring to heavy petting / oral / mutual masturbation. That kind of stuff.

[Aboo]

Vvi, on Jan 31 2009, 12:45 AM, said:

Haha ear and nose?

__inthemaking, on Jan 31 2009, 01:21 AM, said:

And ear/nose?! haha

Irene, on Jan 30 2009, 01:49 PM, said:

Maybe he was referring to non-intercourse sex as there is more than one type of sex.

What other types of non intercourse sex are there? I'm sure belly button sex exists too

Forester, on Jan 31 2009, 04:23 AM, said:

Condoms are 98% reliable when used properly. And that does not mean if you do it 100 times, you are bound to get pregnant 2 times.

Hasn't ToK taught you anything? They claim a 98% reliability, they're not at all that reliable.

Mr. Shiver, on Jan 31 2009, 07:47 AM, said:

No, I was referring to heavy petting / oral / mutual masturbation. That kind of stuff.

That's called foreplay.

[Mushka]

alright alright... we all calim Sex is good and well, it is.. I have met some people who've "popped their cherry" and right atfer they have it they glow! god damnit! ahah I, myself, havent dont it yet.

but honestly, I mean don't you think it should matter who you're doing it with?! i mean, yes yes Sex is good blah blah putting Religion aside but that doesnt mean we should all have an orgy or whatever! plus, I dont think just anybody would be okay to do it with.. I mean even if you're absolutely piss drunk, you would atleast have to know SOMETHING about the guy/girl before jumping into each other's pants, right?

when are they gonna master a 100% affective type of contraception? I mean, for goodness sake its 2009! it's about time!

[Mr. Shiver]

Aboo, on Jan 30 2009, 07:01 PM, said:

That's called foreplay.

Not if they don't precede intercourse.

[Aboo]

Mr. Shiver, on Jan 31 2009, 08:35 AM, said:

Not if they don't precede intercourse.

True, but it's not called other types of sex either.

[Mr. Shiver]

Aboo, on Jan 30 2009, 07:52 PM, said:

True, but it's not called other types of sex either.

Non-penetrative sex. But I don't blame you for the confusion, a lot of the time "sex" and "sexual intercourse" are used interchangeably.

Edited by Mr. Shiver, Jan 31, 2009 - 01:13.

[Irene]

Vvi, on Jan 30 2009, 11:45 AM, said:

Haha ear and nose? My mom's friend used to work as a nurse in casualty, she always told us really gross stories about couples who came in with objects stuck inside them. I'd wanna be a doctor just so I could laugh at all the ridiculous things people get up to in the bedroom.

Wtf, ear and nose? I thought Aboo was joking.... o_o
Ha, you're just as sadistic and cynical as me.

[Aboo]

Irene, on Jan 31 2009, 10:05 AM, said:

Wtf, ear and nose? I thought Aboo was joking.... o_o
Ha, you're just as sadistic and cynical as me.

I was serious about that, some people are crazy

[Ashika]

Vvi, on Jan 29 2009, 09:34 AM, said:

I'm not saying the police should go charging into people's homes, interrupt people having sex and ask them for ID's. But people who are having sex (especially younger girls) normally tell at least one person about it. If that person is concerned about the safety and well-being of the person, they would have the option of reporting it and getting something done about it rather than being told "There's no law, so technically a 9 year old could have sex with a 15 year-old and there's nothing we can do about it."

Of course, then the law seems to be flexible, but maybe it should be. And it's wouldn't be compulsory to report people obviously. But 16 seems a sensible cut off point.

Also, there's the whole thing with younger girls being taken advantage of guys that are over 18. "I love him, that's why we're having sex" at age 13 or 14 is a bit much. They do have cases like this in England where the older man has to go to court (since it's still considered paedophilia even though he's not a 60 year old). The reverse could also happen. A female teacher in my friend's school was fired for having sexual relations with a male student. Either way, it's an unhealthy relationship because of the age difference, physical maturity as well as emotional maturity.

I absolutely agree that children should not be having sex... 100%
I just can't see how it can be monitored... and maybe it should, but I don't see it as a practical solution to this problem.
And like I may have said before, when you tell people not to do something, it makes them want to do it more.

__inthemaking, on Jan 29 2009, 12:39 PM, said:

Yeah I guess so haha. I just hate it when he gets ragged on by guys for still being a virgin. It's easier for me because I'm a girl and people don't really question why I'm waiting. His friends all know the reason why we're waiting, but sometimes acquaintances just push a little too far (like asking my boyfriend if he's gay). I guess I can understand why..I would probably expect an 18 year old guy with a girlfriend of 2 years to have had sex too, but I would never assume there's something "wrong" with him if it turns out they don't.

Ugh, sorry haha /vent.

I think it's admirable that he wants to wait.
Some guys just need to keep their pants on

Vvi, on Jan 30 2009, 01:15 PM, said:

We only have 2 guys in my class, and both of them are virgins. One of them really feels pressured to have sex, since his best friend (who used to be in our class before he moved to Jordan) had sex when he was around 14 and finds it really easy to get girls. So his friend, who's 17, is basically looking for anyone who's willing to have sex with him, which is of course the wrong attitude to be running around with. It all seems to be a competition of who can have sex the earliest.

Some people are so desperate, it's disgusting.

__inthemaking, on Jan 30 2009, 01:51 PM, said:

Yeah I agree. And it's not like he doesn't want to have sex, we very much do haha. Just that school is the most important thing for us right now..we're both in demanding programs and we couldn't deal with the stress of a possible pregnancy, and if I do end up pregnant, we both are against abortion but we're not ready to be parents at 18 yet. And for health risks, I can't go on birth control, so we'd pretty much just be relying on a condom.

Yes! People need to realize the risks of having sex... especially when you have such an intense life. I think if I had a kid at this age, my life would be so ****ed up as would the child's.

__inthemaking, on Jan 30 2009, 06:06 PM, said:

Condoms are pretty reliable, but the problem is that I've heard of way too many horror stories where condoms break, or they come off during sex. Plus my period already has a tendency to be irregular..it can be anywhere from a week early to almost 2 weeks late, and right now when it's a week late, I don't worry about it. But if I was having sex, I would pretty much be freaking out. I can't imagine focusing on school while being paranoid that I'm also pregnant every single month.

Haha, yeah, I used to go months without getting my period... which is why I had to go on the pill. My mother was actually terrified EVERY time that I was pregnant so she made me go on the pill for many different reasons

I really do think that pill + condom is quite effective... but there's always that chance eh?

Mushka, on Jan 30 2009, 08:47 PM, said:

alright alright... we all calim Sex is good and well, it is.. I have met some people who've "popped their cherry" and right atfer they have it they glow! god damnit! ahah I, myself, havent dont it yet.

but honestly, I mean don't you think it should matter who you're doing it with?! i mean, yes yes Sex is good blah blah putting Religion aside but that doesnt mean we should all have an orgy or whatever! plus, I dont think just anybody would be okay to do it with.. I mean even if you're absolutely piss drunk, you would atleast have to know SOMETHING about the guy/girl before jumping into each other's pants, right?

when are they gonna master a 100% affective type of contraception? I mean, for goodness sake its 2009! it's about time!

Man, when people have sex, they have sex y'know? You can't just haul people off each other because they don't know each other. Once again... safe sex please.

Mr. Shiver, on Jan 30 2009, 09:43 PM, said:

Non-penetrative sex. But I don't blame you for the confusion, a lot of the time "sex" and "sexual intercourse" are used interchangeably.

Meh, it's all relative.
Just like some people think "hooking up" is having sex and others think it's making out.