Paper 3 Question?

[suwen.lee_]

Hey friends, 

Yesterday I did my first ever Paper 3 question and I think I kind of messed up? This will be used as my predicted grade which will be sent off on my uni applications hence I am feeling a little anxious. As the time allocated for our exam wasn't enough, we only had to choose one question amongst two and write one essay. The question I chose read "Analyse the reasons and the results of one military intervention from 1960-80". 

I chose to wrote about Pinochet as I was sure that he came to power in 1973 in a coup d'eat. Below is the outline of my essay: 

Introduction: 11th September 1973- Pinochet led a military coup and seized power. Main reason for this intervention was due to Allende's failing policies (especially his economic policies) as well as the tense civilian-military relationships. Main results was that the Chilean people gained economically however lost out socially. 

Paragraph 1&2 (Economic): Allende's failing economic policies- inflation was at a high, lack of consumer goods, nationalised key industries which made managers/industrialists angry and lost their support. Pinochet able to reverse this with help from the Chicago Boys. Inflation dropped from 500% to 8% per year. The food supply improved and the economy did a u-turn and started looking up. Re-entered global markets and privatizing industries which reverted back Allende's mixed capitalist-socialist economy. Hence justifying the claim that the Chileans gained the most economically. But made markets leaner- increased unemployment. Biggest lost was social (link this to next paragraph)

Paragraph 2&3 (Social): Allende also had failing social policies-  Unified National Schooling. Led to riots and had to have state of emergency in 20 states. Allowed military to rise to power and Pinochet to seize power in the coup. However socially was not that good under Pinochet either. Human right abuses prevalent. Military junta established and human rights suspended. No right to assembly and political parties dissolved. I also talked about DINA and the trade union leader being killed and the burning of university students. Disappearences, tortures of Leftist/Allende supporters became common. All these showed that under Pinochet, the Chileans biggest loss was socially. 

Paragraph 4 (Political/Military): Politically Allende wasn't very good either. Did not have much support. Tense civilian-military relations started from Eduardo Frei resulted in the dismissal of General Prats as commander-in-chief of the army. Pinochet replaced him. Without this, Pinochet might not have been able to staged a military coup. The replacement proved significant in the cause of the military intervention. 

Conclusion: Reiterated argument and showed how the reasons for military intervention was due to Allende's incompetent policies and the results meant that the Chileans lost socially but gained significantly economically. 

Would this be an alright essay? Thank you for reading and your help!