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Writing a grade 7 history essay

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Hi,

I've just gotten my recent mid-year exams back, and I got 6/20, 6/20 for both the essays. I felt that it wasn't marked in a way I was taught. Basically my teacher gives us the narration of the wars (WW1/WW2/Spanish Civil War) based on long term, short term, immediate causes of the way the war broke out and then the nature and effects of the war. He keeps emphasizing on "THEMES" to write during the exam. So I wrote themes like German aggression... Economic causes...etc, and giving narration and example evidences based on the points I gave. But I got a six. And the comments were, "Where are the themes?" "Please arrange your ideas based on themes and do not just narrate?"

Though I didn't provide a thorough succinct conclusion, I don't think I would get a 6/20 right? Isn't that abit too harsh.

Isn't a proper essay supposed to be Argument-> Point> Evidence-> Summary? Can someone please enlighten me, and how should I organize my content and thoughts onto the essay?

Thank you!

Edited by talktome

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Since your teacher said that he felt you narrated and did not focus on themes, your 6s aren't based on the conclusion.

I know that I can be biased about my work--I'm just too close to see it objectively. If you can provide me with your thesis and an outline, maybe I can give suggestions. Other than that, use this link for a guideline: Thematic Essays

And this may just be me, but I thought themes were the broad, overarching things, like industrialization not like 'German aggression' in a specific war. Someone correct me if I'm wrong.

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