Friend Troubles

[ABC123456]

I'm in my last year of IB, and being a Senior this year, it's gotten a whole lot busier. I've had tons to do. The situation is, I have two friends, one of which is my best friend, who are not in IB. They don't seem to understand what I have to go through. The way I see it, in traditional classes, all they strive for is the grade; to make the A on the exam and boost their GPA. In IB, however, I have to not only make the grade, but make sure all that information stays in my head so I can pass the IB exams at the end of my high school career. This became an issue last October, my busiest month, when my two friends were saying how they wanted to go on a cruise in February and miss two days of school because of it. Of course I wanted to go, but I have to constantly think of all the stuff I have to do. We were talking about it and I said something like "Why do you guys always do stuff that makes me miss school?(Since they had gone to visit a college and missed a Friday)and my one friend replied, "Well if you don't want to go, then don't." I talked this over with my other friend, my best friend, and she sort of agreed with her. She said she didn't understand why I couldn't miss a few days of school and such. From then I have just felt like I've been drifting from them because of schoolwork and volunteerwork and stuff. I feel like in their eyes I'm probably really lame because all I care about is school.

Any advice?

[Bishup]

Ok we are all Human, we like company and as naturally occurrence we have friends. At this moment in time school is obviously your life and your friends are seemingly in the background. Concentrate on the things you need to do and then when your liberated organise for you guys to do stuff. You don't really have to go and do something you can just hang out and have a nice evening let's say. You have been friends with some time I imagine and in the beginning you had to become friends so there is no reason for you not being able to reconnect by a simple action. If you said to your friends 'hey guys what to hang out' they most probably say yes and then you'd become best friends again.

In the meantime however I suggest you keep into contact, just a bit, like phone calls or Facebook and show that you're still a friend. The moral is don't worry about it too much because things turn out easier to do than they may seem. Referring to your feasible holiday cruise if you feel it will be a nuisance to your studies, just don't go, you always have time to make up for it

[Feist]

I think this is a frequent occurrence between IB candidates and non-IB students. Honestly, your friends need to be more considerate and understanding that IB is a ton of extra added work; there may be people at my school who have no homework this weekend whereas I have an extended essay, TOK and 2IAs to figure out. If it's really becoming a problem, you should talk to them and let them know that you're not the one who wants to be at school while they're on a cruise, it's the responsible choice to make. If they really want to hang out with you, they should plan other things that don't cause a conflict of schedule, or maybe you could take the initiative to plan it as well.

In the end, it's important to remain focused on your goal. At the year's end, you'll be the one receiving that IB Diploma and getting into the university you want (where you will be meeting tons of new friends and no IB!) while they have to worry about competing for admission to a university against people like you.

[sweetnsimple786]

I mostly agree with Bishup. I want to add that I think you can miss some school here and there and be okay. At my school [and I'm sure we're not alone] the kids who have best mastered procrastination are the IB kids. It's a little hard for me to say this because I hate missing school. I lose out the most in English and the sciences because I'm losing points for discussion which is a significant portion of my grade for Eng and it's really hard to catch up in physics because the stuff is often over my head. That being said, I think you can overcome the difficulties because you're a strong student. It's hard, but sometimes it's worth it. You just have to figure out when the price is right.

Butttt February is the month of internal deadlines at my school, and I assume at many other schools. My teacher's warned us it's the hardest month in all of IB. All of the IAs and the EE must be finalized and submitted. I would not want to add extra stress during this time. Missing school = adding stress. On the other hand, a cruise seems pretty relaxing. And when all is said and done, you can always be like 'oh yeah, I did something fun/spontaneous.' Do not do everything for IB/college. I inflated my extracurriculars because they would look good, and now I don't have time to do what I really want to because I have so many responsibilities already. Well I guess it's a little to late for you now because we're both seniors, but still, don't put all of your eggs in the IB/college basket. Do some things because you really want to. On the other, other hand, do you think you'll be on that cruise and lamenting on missed assignments and lectures? If so, it's definitely not worth it. Do what feels right to you and for you. Not what your friends want. What you want. Only you know if you deserve it and can be satisfied with it.